Lady Hunter V
by Shadow-of-a-Wolf
Summary: We all know Dante could pick up a girl anywhere, even on missions. Though where would Vergil go to find a girl and would he need Dante's help with it?
1. Chapter 1

Ok been a while, but I'm back to share in the fantastic art of fan fictions. I don't own any part of DMC; even these OC's have their own individuality that may seem familiar to you or maybe not. Let's get this show on the road!

Lady Hunter V

The Sparda twins are in the demon hunting business and business is good. It was a late night of the usual business and Vergil was in almost top form. Moments earlier a handful of demons appeared before the brothers while they were walking in a park, some were looking to offer the boys some pay back for their dear old dad's legacy. While other's just wanted to have some raise some hell at the wrong moment. So under the pale light of the moon the party was just getting started. "You know you need to get out of the office more often Verg." Dante said as his guns blazed a trail through two demons who tried the sandwich attack. Their plan ended in an epic failure with a side of demon dust. Vergil sighed as he beheaded two demons with one swipe of his blade before speaking. "Is this on of your frivolous excuses to get me out so you can throw another one of your pizza parties? Don't you remember what happened last time?"

Dante paused for a moment and thought back to the last party. "Hey" he snapped "I didn't know Kevin Fenderline was going to show up and start singing and it's not my fault your room is the farthest from that horrible voice. Besides you had some company that night so it was cool." Vergil glared at his brother before carving up a demon like a holiday ham and yelled "Britney Spears is not my idea of good company!" Dante started laughing at his brother's seething angry "Oh yeah you tried to grab Yamato but you ended up grabbing Paris Hilton's leg instead" Vergil shuddered at the thought of that night and took his frustration out on the last demon who must have heard the conversation cause with its last breath it coughed up a laugh. Vergil's face showed a faint smile "At least the payback was sweet; you did enjoy your alarm clock right?" Dante turned and gave his dear brother the finger upon remembering how Weird Al started singing in his room at four o'clock in the morning. The two pondered the question of how some of these people even found out about the party. Vergil just thought to himself, "When Dante throws a party be weary of uninvited trouble."

After the battle the guys made their way back to the Devil May Cry shop. "It seems like we act like this whenever our coworkers are on vacation." Vergil stated. Lady and Trish were on a cruise to the tropics as a way of getting away from the twins. Though every time he and Dante looked at their wallets they were reminded that they were the one's who really paid for it. Dante walked in and laid on the couch with a magazine. He was muttering to himself about the high price of fashion these days. Vergil made his way up stairs to his own little library to indulge himself in a few new books he ordered online. As he read a story of war torn lovers in feudal Japan he sighed at the mere thought of their situation and their commitment to one another. Then his thoughts drifted to the memories of his mom and dad telling him and Dante how they met, their father's lame pick up lines and the finally realization of true love. After all love is what saved him from the pits of hell, Dante never stopped believing in him. Vergil closed the book as a knock on the door disturbed his train of thought.

Vergil opened his door to find Dante grinned like some red clad jester. _Should I even ask or should I just close the door now_, thought Vergil. Dante spoke after hearing his brother thoughts "Hey Vergil don't be so hasty, I'm just here to invite you to a night on the town a local band needs my skills at a club and you need to get out of this tomb of a room for a few hours anyway. Vergil was about to turn and walk away then out of no where Dante's doppelganger shadow grabbed him. Dante just smiled "You never did like taking the easy way out of things did cha? Oh well let's go." Vergil had never cursed at his brother so much in his life. He made sure it was a battle all the way from his room to the car as Dante had to use all his skills to dodge sword after sword his brother projected his way. Once they were both seated in the car, Dante's doppelganger released a very unpleased Vergil. Vergil just growled at his brother "Let's just get this over! Dante smirked since Vergil had no idea what the coming nights had in store for him.

They reached the club which was appropriately named in Vergil's case The Hand of Fate, just as Dante's friend Eddie was about to get on stage with his band. The club was filled with people some who had come for the concert and others who had just come for the drinks. Vergil looked around to see sailors in strong man contests, a few unlucky guys drinking their problems away and even a picture of his dear brother the resident drinking contest champ. Ever the showoff Dante jumped on stage and started a guitar solo before being introduced by Eddie. "Here he is everyone my best mate and special guest for the evening who's skills are as hot as his jacket, Dante!" exclaimed Eddie over the room full of cheers. Vergil hinted the British accent of Eddie and thought, _maybe this won't be so bad I'll just sit down and have a cup of tea or a glass of wine._ He motioned for the bartender and asked "Can I get your finest glass of wine." The bartender was a burly Brit who must have seen his share of fights. There were scars on his hands and cut by his eye forcing him to wear an eye patch or at least that's what he told people.

Upon hearing the request he started laughing. Then he raised a question "Which one of you pansy ass knob heads has the nerve to ask for a glass of wine in my club?" No one said anything, not out of fear of the bartender, out of fear of the man standing behind the bartender. Vergil was thinking up ways to the guy but then he remembered which side he was on now. "Wooh-sah, Wooh-sah" he whispered trying to calm himself down as he sat back down and wrote a small note. The bartender went in the back thinking he had just shut who ever ordered the drink up with his commanding voice. His next voice however was more like the shrill of a young woman. "Eeeeehhh!" he screamed as a seemingly blue sword that came very close to beheading him struck the wall in front of him. There was even a note attached which the freaked out man quickly read. "If you ever call someone a pansy ass irritating idiot the next one will hit you in your fat ass you walking pile of beer swilling shit. P.S. In the mean time might I suggest you start serving wine and probably a change of pants while your at it?" The bartender shook from his fright to notice the he had a fairly large mess on both sides of his pants. With all the excitement he ran all the way home screaming of ghost and wine. Vergil decided it was best to just listen to his brother do one of the things he does best besides finish off a pizza in less than two minutes. The first song was a nicely done remake of Dani California. If memory served him right it was the same remake Dante had sung for Lady at the karaoke bar a few weeks ago.

Then Vergil noticed it while he was enjoying the music, Dante kept motioning his head as if to signal someone. _What in the world is he up to?_, Vergil questioned himself. At that moment a young woman with a few tattoos that looked familiar to Vergil walked up to his table. "Hello and you are?" asked Vergil. She smiled and said "I am Zelena, your humble servant my dark master." Vergil was seriously confused by this lady not to mention a little concerned for his own well-being. "I'm sorry but you've got the wrong guy." Just as Vergil said this he noticed the tattoos looked like some of the various demons he and Dante had killed over the years, but he felt no demonic aura from the woman. The lady spoke in a gently yet creepy way like one of those ways that just screamed this chick was not in her right mind. "Oh no I've checked with your brother and after researching your family's history I knew you had to be the dark master I had been waiting for." Vergil's eyes were going everywhere. From the various exits to trying to see if he could spot Ashton Kutcher in the crowd. Even a chilled glare was given to Dante that seemed to scream one thing "Dante must die!"

Then his eyes focused back on the young Hispanic woman who seemed to have been speaking this whole time. "Dark Master? Have you heard a word I've said?" she asked. Vergil decided that maybe around this woman ignorance is bliss and calmly spoke "Of course I have and please just call me Vergil." Her voice hinted of joy "Oh yes! My Dark Mas . . . . uuhhh I mean Vergil so when shall we cast demons upon this world and cleanse it?" Vergil was awestruck and slightly amused, _I wonder if I should tell her been there done that and failed. I just want to relax in the human world now. _Vergil looked at her eyes and saw that she was dead serious and seemed to be moving herself closer to him. He thought that mind control could answer his problems so he started expressing his thoughts in her mind. _You are very tired and confused, possibly heavily mediated. Go home or to the police and rest forget this place, my name and my face. To you Sparda and his legacy are some upcoming movie starring Johnny Depp, Antonio Banderrras and The Rock._Then under the table he snapped his hands. He saw she was in trance, but then she sprung to life asking so when are you free for spawning demon children. Vergil was in shock and made a mental note to hunt down every magician he had seen use mind control. Never once had he thought of kids and here this woman was treating them like an addition to his life schedule. Vergil decided, _Ok time to lie like the devil I am. _Stood up and in a demanding voice spoke to this crazy woman, "We'll need the head of a chupacabra, some bandages of the last pharaoh of Egypt, the blood of Jimi Hendrix and a box of Lucky Charms." Then she questioned his list "Lucky Charms?" Vergil holding in his laughter spoke "Yes didn't you know they really are magically delicious especially for releasing demons. And bring me these things by the next rising of the blue moon. After hearing his request she dashed off, but not before he saw her mark a V on her head with rum. Dante had just finished up for the night and saw how his twin had fared, _not to worry Verg the next girl will be a complete opposite. _All Vergil could think was, _I hope thats the last i'll see of her._

Or is it? Reviews please and the next girl will be just as Dante said I promise.


	2. Chapter 2

Lady Hunter V ch. 2

I am ecstatic to be getting back to what I enjoy. I deeply apologize to anyone who has been missing my work. Multiple things have been pulling me away; Eric has been pushing me back towards what is important, you guys my fellow writers and fans of all things creative. So first off I don't own anything related to devil may cry so I can't be sued. And second the wolf is back.

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"Vergil." The voice said as the young devil hunter was trying to sleep, a voice that had managed to make itself known every time he tried to sleep for the past few days. At first he tried to ignore it, thinking it was just Nevan making sultry attempts towards him. However when he went to go check on the devil arms, Nevan was in the case. She was talking but clearly not to him.

"Ah, Nero. Once I get my fangs in you, I'll make a real man out of you and you can show me some tricks that devil arm can do."

Vergil teleported up the steps after hearing that succubus's sexual statement. He shuddered at the thought in his mind as sexual images no one should ever see ran wild. _Him? I thought she would have better standards than that and besides she's tempted the pizza boy so much Dante had to threaten his life the next time he showed up without a pizza. _He went up the stairs and back to sleep. This meant having to hear that sweet and mysterious voice calling to him again.

The next morning Vergil strolled around the office reading a new book that even seemed to catch Dante's eye as he passed.

"Verg, are you feeling ok?" Dante asked as he gave his brother a confused look."

"I'm fine and what made you ask that?"Vergil shot back glaring at his twin.

"You're reading a _Twilight_ book and not even the ladies touch those. Dante said as he held a cold slice of pizza to his mouth.

"Yes, that's true and I have two things to say now. One this book is horrible; it's taken all my will power not to gouge my own eyes out. Two you and Lady argue so much that don't you think it's about time you two hooked up?" Dante spit out a piece of his breakfast as a slice of pepperoni flew towards Vergil. The disgusted twin wasted no time in summoning a blue sword and pinning the topping to the wall. "What? Call it brotherly advice."

"Oh, is that what you want to call it?" Dante smirked, "Well bro, I'm going to assist you with your little love life issues so you can stop giving me advice. You see, a friend of mine has a sister who would be perfect for you. You guys can talk about what ever deep thing you want to cause she can be just as boring as you. She'll be at the bookstore in an hour and her name is Ruth. "

Vergil tried to protest Dante's attempt to get rid of him but he was already pushing him out the door.

"And hey Vergil, remember to be honest with yourself and others." Dante said as he slammed the door.

Vergil took a moment to think about Dante's parting words. _Well before I came back he did just live with a bunch of women and an annoying little girl. Maybe too many lifetime movies managed to get stuck in his head._

Five minutes later Dante heard a knock at the door. He opened it and sighed "Verg, you've got to go for this girl man and leave me the hell . . ." Dante looked down at a young man holding a bouquet of flowers with a card that said 'Nevan' on the front. "That damn guitar." He mumbled to himself. He looked at the young man and knew what he had to do. "Hold on buddy I know what you need." The guy just stood there with an eager smile on his face. Dante came back and pulled out Ebony. Seeing the gun pointed to his face snapped the guy out of whatever trance he was in. "You need to get my damn pizza!"

Down the street Vergil was attempting to piece together the situation he had just been placed in. He was on his way to meet yet another mysterious woman. Yet the thing that troubled him the most was that it was on Dante's terms.

_Am I losing my touch, to be outfoxed by my lazy party boy of a brother? I know I felt a chill when I left Hell, but this is ridiculous, _Vergil thought to himself as he stepped into the bookstore. The ring of the door opening seemed to shake Vergil from his thoughts. He immediately put his guard up as if the room was filled with every demon the underworld could spew out instead of the geeks, cook book fanatics and study groups that filled the room

Then he spotted a rather anxious looking woman sitting down and scanning the room just as the young half devil was doing. Then their eyes met and time itself seemed to stop.

The woman mouthed a name so she wouldn't disturb and of the people reading.

"Vergil," as the man in question nodded his head and walked over to her.

"You must be Ruth." Vergil said as he looked at the woman carefully. She had long red hair, porcelain skin, green eyes and she seemed to favor crosses as he eyed the two hanging on her neck. "What a rather interesting name, you don't find many women named Ruth in this city." She smiled at his comment and then fired one of her own.

"I could say the same about you. The last time I heard the name Vergil, it was in my old college mythology book." Vergil looked at her with a slight interest now and did something out of character. He took his eyes off a book and in this case Ruth had quite a few books at her table with interesting titles. These titles ranged from John Constantine's "Can a Demon be Anointed?", "Chicken Soup for the Saved Soul" and "The Way of the Sword . . . of Light."

Ruth kept her eyes on the intriguing young man; while her mind toyed with the image of her fantasy prince finally having a name . . . Vergil.

"How did you come to hear about me Miss?" Vergil questioned.

"Well to tell you the truth, my sister came home one day talking about this great guy she met at a bookstore."Ruth said which caused Vergil to raise an inquiring brow.

He took a moment to think back to the last time he was at a bookstore. It was last week on a Monday and he remembered going in to find a new novel to read. He found nothing but stories that hinted of romance which lead his mind to wonder. The trip may have been a waste but Vergil couldn't recall meeting a woman.

Ruth noticed his puzzled look and continued with her story. "You see she met this guy in a red jacket reading a magazine with a weird title, _How to play Devil May Cry on the Wii_. He flashed an amazing smile and she ran home like a giddy school girl."

Vergil glanced up as a cup of espresso was placed in front of him with a cup of milk and a mint leaf on the side. He noticed the coffee girl was smiling at him. He didn't return the smile since he felt it would be rude to Ruth.

"I see."

"She said she saw him again only this time he was wearing a blue jacket this time around and he slicked his hair back. She told me about him and I just had to meet this amazing guy so here I am."

Vergil paused for a moment as the gears in his head turned for half a second, he'd been tricked. Dante just didn't want to go meet this girl. _He had known his brother was lazy, could that be the only reason Dante set him up?_

Ruth noticed Vergil facial expression. Too serious to be nervousness and too concentrated to be spaced out. She took that as a chance for her to break the ice.

"So Vergil, are you royalty or just a fancy dresser?" she questioned looking at his taste in clothing.

_Royalty she says . .. Well I guess if she asked that _question_ a few hundred years back the answer may have been yes._ Vergil thought to himself as he opened his mouth to answer.

"I'm simply a refined gentleman being hounded by a moronic twin brother who eats too much junk food. What about you Ms. Ruth, I take it from your attire that you have a sense of divine devotion. Such devotion that possible started at a young age due to your parents possibly being well known in a church, one of them could have been a preacher perhaps?"

The two strangers grew quiet. Ruth reflected on the Sherlock like deduction with complete awe as Vergil simply smirked as if he knew he had part of Ruth's past figured out.

"Well don't look so smug, it was just a lucky guess," said Ruth as she finally came back from her sense of bewilderment.

"Are you saying you could do the same to me?" Vergil asked as his eyes lit up with anticipation. "Then by all means let's see."

"Before I begin, how can I be sure I'm talking to Vergil and not this twin of his?" she questioned the silver haired soothsayer.

Vergil raised a brow to her question before going into details as to why he was who he said he was.

"Miss, if I were indeed my twin brother I assure of two things. One I'd be asleep by now since any conversation that doesn't involve music, junk food or random magazines knock him out faster than any over the counter drug. Two I haven't tried any annoying pickup lines or been disrespectful the entire time we've talked. "

Ruth felt a bead of sweat hit her brow as nervousness began to overcome her. She steadied herself and gave him a response brimming with confidence.

"You come from a privileged family which influenced your aristocratic views. Your parents were lawyers or something like that. And your brother's the rebel of the family that's why he set you up with me thinking I was a nice woman with a naughty side. Which sorry to disappoint I'm a saint through and through." Ruth's eyes told just how confident she was in her own abilities. Vergil's eyes told a different story, one of epic fail. His smile only seemed to put an exclamation mark on the fail.

"Bravo Ms. Ruth."Vergil clapped his hands together as if to praise her.

"Just call it my gift from above." She said "You're not the only on ... "

Vergil interrupted her with a heavy sigh.

"To tell you the truth Ruth and the truth is something my brother has been pushing me to do more of. Your prediction was dead wrong. While your duties are to God, I'm part demon . . . on my father's side I'm not your white knight in shining armor, I'm more of a reformed and quite deadly demonic knight."

"This has got to be a joke." Ruth said as she smiled uneasy at her blind date.

"I'm not much of a comedian and everything I've just said is indeed fact."

This news hit Ruth like an 18 wheeler to the face as Vergil put his head down in shame. Her mental picture prince charming was replaced by the idea of some hell spawn trying to steal her soul. She knew what she needed to do. She went into her purse as Vergil lifted his head to find himself face to face with a bottle of holy water.

"Now Ruth there's no need to turn this nice outing into one big mess, I mean you're a lovely lady." Vergil's voice remained calm as he carefully eyed the bottle. An As Seen on TV label was partially still on the bottle.

Vergil mumbled a quick thought, "Doused with the cheap stuff, just great."

"Die you unholy monster!" Ruth yelled as she splashed the water in his face.

Vergil held his face in pain as he uttered his parting words.

"Sorry things didn't work out; I'm new at this. Bye!" He made a hasty exit by teleporting to the safest place in the city Devil May Cry. Unfortunately Dante had left the place a mess so his shoes landed right on a half eaten pizza.

"Hey bro, sorry about the mess and from the looks of that burn you had quite a night. I gotta say the scarred look works better for you than me."

Dante's teasing was met with an angry growl. As Vergil held his face until he started healing. The only mark left was a scorch mark on his cheek that would be gone by morning.

No worries because I've got two words for you . . . speed dating." Dante said as he looked at his twin.

"I'll entertain your idea another time; I've got a word for you ... DIE!" Vergil yelled as he sent furniture blue swords sprawling towards Dante's room only to be stopped by a closed door.

Nice try Verg, but chill out I ... Before Dante could finish Vergil stormed to his room.

Dante just smiled and said, "I had nothing to do with these whack jobs."

As silence filled the halls Vergil looked at his bookcase eager to escape the nightmare he had been through. He reached up to grab any random book he laid hands on. As he took the book down he read the cover "A Midsummer Night's Dream". Seems Vergil would have to endure that voice and along with Shakespeare's haunting poetry tonight.

Elsewhere Ruth was still distraught so she turned to the only place she ever knew. A church was in the distant and as she ran in, she saw the confession booth. Time to confess what in her eye, were dreadful sins.

"F f f f forgive me father, for I have been in the company of a devil. I was seduced by his charm not noticing his forked tongue."

An elderly man of God attempted to soothe her, "My child what has stirred your heart so heavily."

"A demon has stirred me Father." Ruth said.

"And where did you see this demon?" he questioned.

"At the bookstore earlier, he wore a blue jacket and had platinum hair slicked back." Ruth's voice was calm now since it seemed he believed her story.

The other side of the confessional was silent more a moment. This made Ruth a little anxious to hear what he would say. What scripture or piece of heavenly advice he would give.

Then he finally spoke. "This is a serious case my dear, I'll have to handle this face to face in order to see if the demon has enchanted you."

Ruth understood as she stepped out of the booth to meet her saintly advice giver. Her eyes grew wide as she saw the man she had been talking to. He was rather tall, his eyes were two different colors and his face was scarred.

The man held a book in one hand as he leaned over and whispered in her ear. "I'm terribly sorry but he won't be the only demon you see tonight!"

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Well first off I'd like to thank my partner in writing crime EricDraven201. It's been one heck of trip back. I hope you enjoy this chapter and sooner or later Vergil will meet that special lady.

Nero: Why am I never in your stories!

Wolf: You whine.

Nero: I do nooooooooooottttttttt!

Wolf: (Takes out a pistol) You do and if your lucky you may get a fic in the future. *winks*

Eric takes the pistol and shoots Nero.

Eric: You were joking right?

Shadow: Well gotta go folks. We need to hide this body. Please review and let me know if i did a good job. Adios


End file.
